Seekers Episode 6 – How To Find True Love

Seekers is a podcast focused on answering common life questions through the infinite wisdom of God’s living word – The Holy Bible.

Who we love says as much about us as it does about them. There are no words stronger than love to describe affection toward another. True love is the one you marry, the one you spend the rest of your life with. True love is reserved for the special person that makes you better, and is always there for you.

True love is the one that’s there for you when nobody else is, the one that cares for you when you’ve failed in the world’s eyes. True love is decent, modest, humble, and amazing. It makes you a better person while keeping you company in bright moments and dark. True love is so special it’s tough to put into words. Most of all true love is rare. It’s an ounce of gold sitting amidst a mountain of rocks.

How do we find true love? What do we look for? And how we will know when it’s true love and not some other emotion that brings us strife like like lust or settling for someone you know isn’t right? In this episode of Seekers I look at what the bible says about love – where true love comes from, what the characteristics of it are, and what it looks like when we find it.

Let’s pray.

God, you are awesome, and I give you all praise. I thank you for allowing us to record another message today. I thank you for the those that will listen to this, and I ask that you bless the message Lord. Let people learn what true love really is, and never settle for less. In Your name I pray, amen.

It All Starts with Love of The Father

If you want to know about the invention it helps to get to know the inventor. BMW automobiles are made for performance more so than nearly any other car on the market. It helps to know that  Karl Rapp, the founder of one of the companies that would merge to become BMW, started as a builder of 12 cylinder aircraft engines. You can understand the performance-mindedness of BMW a great deal more by just knowing that little tidbit about the founder.

If we can understand God, then we will understand ourselves better. God give us His word to tell us about Himself.

1 John 4:8

He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love.

So we know that God is love. That the origin and meaning of love is God. And that God has a plan for us.

John 14:15

If ye love me, keep my commandments.

So here we see love used in the context of us. If we love God, which we should since He made us, then we should keep his commandments. By keeping His commandments we are exhibiting love.

Just in case you need a quick brush up on the 10 commandments, I’ll list them:

Exodus 20: 1-17

20 And God spake all these words, saying,

2 I am the Lord thy God, which have brought thee out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage.

3 Thou shalt have no other gods before me.

4 Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth.

5 Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the Lord thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me;

6 And shewing mercy unto thousands of them that love me, and keep my commandments.

7 Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain; for the Lord will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain.

8 Remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy.

9 Six days shalt thou labour, and do all thy work:

10 But the seventh day is the sabbath of the Lord thy God: in it thou shalt not do any work, thou, nor thy son, nor thy daughter, thy manservant, nor thy maidservant, nor thy cattle, nor thy stranger that is within thy gates:

11 For in six days the Lord made heaven and earth, the sea, and all that in them is, and rested the seventh day: wherefore the Lord blessed the sabbath day, and hallowed it.

12 Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee.

13 Thou shalt not kill.

14 Thou shalt not commit adultery.

15 Thou shalt not steal.

16 Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour.

17 Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that is thy neighbour’s.

So we have to start by loving God, and by living a life pleasing to Him.

When You Love God, and Live For Him, Good Things Happen

John 15:5

I am the vine, ye [are] the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing.

Can I ask a question? What can of fruit is your life bearing today? What good things are happening from your existence?

If you are abiding in God your life will bear fruit. This can be spiritual fruit, growing in the Lord, it can be blessings, like a growing family, or a new career, or it can simply be an enduring peace in your heart knowing that God is in control. This is the knowledge that will allow you to patiently wait on true love.

See the world wants us to hurry up and get a romance going. The world is obsessed with brokenness when it comes to love. Or as I like to call it, fake love. The world loves fake love. It loves sad love songs, broken hearts, sad goodbyes, messy relationships, premarital sex, hedonism, trans and gay love, and other things the bible calls an abomination.

But God has much more in store for those that abide in Him. For those that wait patiently on the Lord. God doesn’t want you to settle for messy, broken, fake love relationships. God wants to give you the best of the best. But you have to be patient, and you have to abide in Him.

So you can say true love is an act of faith and discipline. Waiting on God to provide you with the one He knows is just right for you.

And Here’s What True Love Looks Like

So what to look for? Here are three traits the bible shows us true love inhibits.

1 – It’s everlasting, not fleeting

Jeremiah 31:3

3 The Lord hath appeared of old unto me, saying, Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with lovingkindness have I drawn thee.

So if the person you are thinking about marrying has the tendency to drop off the map from time-to-time, and be a little sketchy for lack of a better word. This is NOT the true love you’ve been waiting for. You want the one you know will stick through life’s up’s and down’s with you through and through.

2 – It’s peaceful, there is no fear

1 John 4:18

18 There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.

If you are afraid of the person you want to marry, or how they will act, then this isn’t the right one for you. Fear is not love. When we fear someone or something we are not endeared to it the way we ought to be, and we are in danger of putting ourselves in a bad situation. Remember, if fear is kicking in then there is some type of reason for it. A reason our minds and bodies are telling us no, keeping going, this is not it.

3- A Powerful Sacrifice

Love is the greatest emotion we can have toward each other.

1 Corinthians 13:13

And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these [is] charity.

In this verse charity means love. The type of love we have for each other is often admiration, or affection, but rarely is charitable love. The type of love that is sacrificial.

Ask yourself, is the person you think is your true love the type that would sacrifice for you. Not give you a french fry at dinner, but his or her last dollar if you needed it, or forgo sleeping on the only bed in a house to let you have it, while they took the floor. The type that takes their sweatshirt off on a cold day and gives it to you, even if they aren’t wearing anything but a t-shirt beneath.

Sacrificial love is special, and it’s rare. To find someone that loves you enough to give up something significant to their own wellbeing. That’s when you know it’s true love.

I’m not sure if you noticed or not, but all the examples of true love I’ve given today – everlasting, peaceful, sacrificial – signify Jesus. They are who He is. He offers us everlasting love. He offers us a peace that surpasseth all understanding. And He made the biggest sacrifice of them all, laying down His life to save us from a sin debt that was to send us to hell. Jesus is the perfect picture of true love.

A very familiar verse that exemplifies true love better than anything else – John 3:16 – For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

As with so much in the bible. When we study it we see both God’s amazing love for us, and are given practical instructions for living life, like what the traits are of true love. This is what makes the infinite wisdom in the bible so powerful. It’s both a balm to our souls, and a map to our lives. A way to understand how great our God is, and a way to see how He would have us live.

So what are you waiting for? True love starts with God. Fall in love with Him, and His word, and you will have everything you need to find, evaluate, and eventually discover true love forevermore.

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